Hey, did u know that diarrhea is hereditary? It runs in your jeans By: Trey & Trenton of Texas

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knock knock who's there Scott, Scott who, Scott Rollheiser stole my joke and posted it here.

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How do you get a little kid out of a tree Throw a jar of foreskin at him

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It is so hard to write an antijoke.

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An owl and a squirrel where siting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl then turned to the squirrel and said nothing... cos owls can't talk. The owl then eats the bird because it is a bird of prey

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What do you get when you jab a four year old with a pair of scissors? A warrant for your arrest.

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Why did suzy fall of the swing? -she had no arms... Why couldn't she get back up? -she had no friends

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what do you call an ocelot with ebola? an ocelot that might die soon.

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Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

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A father walks in on his kid masturbating to pictures of horses and promptly divorces his wife.

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What happened when the prisoner dropped the soap? He picked it up.

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Duh, its red not ginger, like really really red... Not unlike my eyes, which is a bit of the reason I dye it., I also use colored contact lenses most of the time now.

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Why did the baby cross the road? 'cause i kicked it.

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You shove her off the bed

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elen degeneres is straight....

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was feeling suicidal due to an existential crisis.

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Why do girls have bumps around their nipples ? -it's brai for suck here .

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i am iron man running over fat kids in my van

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Knock Knock *opens the door*

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why is my phone broken i dropped it

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How much wood could the woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A relatively small amount compared to the amount of trees in the world.

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A man is gay, a parade is held in his honor. A man is black, a holiday is named after him. A man is white, he laughs at the stupidity in the world today.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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