A man walks into a bar and says "ow"; he stepped on a nail sticking up through one of the floorboards. He then sues the bartender for a large sum of money because of the injury he sustained, and causes the bartender to lose everything he owns in order to pay off his debt.

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A: Knock Knock B: ...

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Why did Hitler kill himself? Cause he couldn't afford to pay the gas bill.

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Nature is filled with wondrous things. No really, this isn't a joke.

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What do an eagle and a badger have in common? They both live underground...except the eagle

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Im good at other things... ...like giving handshakes

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What a person such as you would say. Anyway, did you notice how I started by emulating your way of typing, spelling, spacing and so on?

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Your mom is so ugly that she was mercilessly bullied throughout high school which led to severe depression and low self-esteem, however she went to college, got a career, found a man who loved her for who she is, not how she looks, and raised a family happily ever after.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your real father. I left you when you were a month old and I have regretted the decision ever since. I would like to be a part of your life.

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What did the poor family eat for thanksgiving? Food

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There's two bears in the shower. One bear says "pass the soap". The other bear says "no soap. Radio".

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Your mom is so fat that when she went to the Doctors, He said she was slightly over weight

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Knock Knock. -Who's there ? It's me. -Come in.

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A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. Sucks to be a fish.

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Why did the boy get hit by the bus? He didn't check both sides before crossing

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What is the easiest method of making multiple women fall head over heels in your presence? Have a wingman help you raise a rope at the start of a women's running race.

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Have you seen the painting by Stevie Wonder? It's a Monet and this museum's most prized piece. Just kindly ask Mr. Wonder to step aside a bit.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing Because she had no arms

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What did Santa Clause say to Rudolf? Nothing. Santa's not real.

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There are 3 poeple on an air plane. The pope, a boy scout, and barak obama. The plane is about to crash and there is only 2 parachutes. omba said im the president of the united states and one of the worlds smartest african americans so he jumped out. The Pope told the boy scout " i lived a long happy life you take the last parachute and jump." The boy scout replied what there are still 2 left the " worlds smartest negro jumped out with my backpack.

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? I don't know it really depends on the car, usually about 2 in the front, 3 in the back and... That's about it

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What do you call white people that live in a trailer park? Residents.

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Doris was putting up Christmas lights when he noticed the bulb's suddenly came on. He was puzzled at first, as he hadn't plugged them in. He climbed down the ladder and found that it was his son, Robby who had plugged the lights in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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