Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

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Redneck girls. Now there's a joke.

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Why did the black kid fail his math test? Because he had down syndrome

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Where did Sheyanne go during the bombing...... Everywhere

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you are black i am black except for your big hairy ass

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xavier stop

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How many blacks does it take to screw in a light bulb? blacks don't work

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What does Chuck Noris have under his beard? A chin

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Q:What does a wheel a triangle and a circle all have in common A:There all round, I lied about the triangle.

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how do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker face

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a banana.

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a horse walks into a bar. what does the bartender say? why is there a horse in my bar.

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A man with his masters degree, has a great job, and gets good money. Has a wife and kids. He is very successful.

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Somewhere in prison- Germany 1940 Janurary, Tuesday, 630PM: "Why doya' think you're so innocent" "It was only a jew!"

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i once thought i could do crytal meth but then i thought naw better not

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How did the boy die in the holocaust? Cancer

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? lettuce lettuce who? Lett-uce be friends

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Lets go Yankees

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Q:Where was The Declaration of Independence signed? A: At the bottom

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whats the similarities between an xbox and michael jackson? there both made of plastic and they both get turned on by children

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Why did the milk man cry? Cause you killed his family.

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what happens if you set micheal jackson on fire nothing he is 6 feet under incased in concrete if he wasnt hed melt

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Long ago, when sailing ships ruled the sea, this captain and his crew were always in danger of being boarded by pirates from a pirate ship. One day while they were sailing, they saw that a pirate ship had sent a boarding party to try and board their ship. The crew became worried, but the Captain was calm. He bellowed to his First Mate, "Bring me my red shirt!" The First Mate quickly got the Captain's red shirt, which the captain put on. Then he led his crew into battle against the mean pirates. Although there were some casualties among the crew, the pirates were defeated. Later that day, the lookout screamed that there were two pirate vessels sending two boarding parties towards their ship. The crew was nervous, but the Captain, calm as ever, bellowed, "Bring me my red shirt!" And once again the battle was on! The Captain and his crew fought off the boarding parties, though this time more casualties occurred. Weary from the battles, the men sat around on deck that night recounting the day's events when an ensign looked at the Captain and asked, "Sir, why did you call for your red shirt before the battle?" The Captain, giving the ensign a look that only a captain can give, explained, "If I am wounded in battle, the red shirt does not show the blood, so you men will continue to fight unafraid." The men sat in silence. They were amazed at the courage of such a man. As dawn came the next morning, the lookout screamed that there were pirate ships, 10 of them, all with boarding parties on their way. The men became silent and looked to the Captain, their leader, for his usual command. The Captain, calm as ever, bellowed, 'Bring me my white flag!"

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? No-one because that's not feasible.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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