What do you call a snail driving a boat? An accident waiting to happen.

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Three girls are eating icecream one girl sucks on her icecream the second girl licks on her icecream and the third girl bites on her icecream. Q: Which of the three girls is married? A: The girl with the wedding ring.

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Why didn't the Priest have a TV ? A black man stole it

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the black person

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Q. who's george porchy?

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What did the rednecks say when they saw the bat? Ma, I'm afraid this is the Myotis Sodalis, or Indian Bat. It is an endangered species. Thus, we cannot shoot it.

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Why did Lou Gehrig die from? ALS

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whats worse than a dead cat in your apple? a dead baby in your apple.

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What did the ketchup say to the mustard? Nothing they're just condiments.

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Uhh, yeah, some of it, I mean people never looked me in the eyes on the buss really, I dunno,if you think I am pretty maybe it is just your opinion or something, but thanks, you are hones and its nice. Never been out drinking, I am you know, kinda nerdy, I just prefer hanging out with friends at home.

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What green and has wheels? grass I lied about the wheels

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

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What did the nerd say to his friend regarding the test they had just taken? - Nothing, he doesn't have any friends.

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What do you call a hairless penis, whatever gay name you decided to nickname it

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this is not a joke. jks

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i have yougurt with tractor

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How do you get your mom off a clown? hit your mom with an axe

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Why did Margret eat the banana? She was hungry.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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why did Rebecca black get down on Fridays? because she had school every other day of the week.

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Q: You know what you should add to your recipe? A: No, not really. Tell me. Q: What? Are you expecting an answer now? Why don't you just shoot me, huh?! Pee on my clothes and set them on fire! You racist son of an **orange**.... It certainly tastes better with oranges.

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What's black, white, and red all over? An ovulating mulatto woman.

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How do you fit an elephant inside your car?: Starve it to death, then chop it in pieces.

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Violets are blue, Roses are red, I like to mix up my poems.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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