If god gives you lemons keep the lemon go to the store and buy oranges to make orange juice.

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Q.what do you call 7x7 A.A math equation

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Q: Why did the man eat the banana? A: Cuz he was hungry!

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and mop. In turns out the bartender was a paranoid schizophrenic and was hallucinating.

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Why did the pineapple cry? It didn't, because it's a pineapple.

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How do you get your little brother to stop kicking you? Stick his feet in the garbage disposal.

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what did hitler say before he turned on the gas who are you calling a dick dina

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Why was timmy in the well? He had autism.

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Yo momma so fat, she has large amount of fat deposited in her body

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What's worst than the Holocaust? No Wi-Fi

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Q: What did the chinese guy say to his friend? A: ??

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Q: what the apple say to the orange? A: nothing because there fruits and fruits cant talk

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There was a Black and a Mexican in a car, they were on their way to church.

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What do you call a white guy surrounded by black guys? -Steve Nash

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knock knock who's there me me who? me me me me who? me me me me me me who? and the more the joke continues the less funny and more annoying it gets

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Why is six afraid of seven. Because seven is a rapist.

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If someone tells you to look behind you do you? No

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Why was six afraid of seven? Back when seven was in Vietnam, he sufferd Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and constantly has flash backs and irrational thoughts of six being with the veitnamese alliance and tries to viciously molest six whenever he runs out of anxiety medication.

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what has wings, bald but doesn't fly? a bald eagle... i lied at the flying part because i'm a f*cking lier from hell watching porn all day with my brother...

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what do you call someone who hates jews anti semitic

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You know what helps with back pain? If you lick my butt hole.

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A guy walks into the bar and orders a coke with some ice and some peanuts. It cost a total of $4.00 plus tax. He gave the bartender $5.00 and told him to keep the change. He drank the soda pop and burped loudly and left the bar and forgot his peanuts.

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Q )Why did the black man shoot the white man? A )The black man had been walking home from his weekly gospel service at the local church when suddenly the criminal had stopped him in his tracks. In a desperate attempt to save himself he seized the gun from the white man and shot him in the leg in order to defend himself. He survived.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was persecuted for his faith.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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