When Kylie and Conner have a baby he will have a centimeter Schmeter!

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What did the children in India eat for dinner?

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There are four dead people on a boat. They commit suicide. Why did they commit suicide. To get to the other side!

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what did the blind deaf orphan get for christmas? cancer

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r jerks n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

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Q: What did the black man say to his Ex wife after she placed a restraining order on him? A: nothing, he was no longer allowed contact with her of any kind and thus could not converse with her

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why did the chicken cross the road because the farm is across the street from were it is now

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Q: What dosent a Jew and a pizza have in commen? A: The pizza dosent scream when you put it in the oven.

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Why was the guy with six fingers called John? His name was John.

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irish wristwatch JLR

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Why is a building called a building when it's already been built? My pinky is pink and my liver helps me live.

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Question: What did Mr. Reeves say. Answer: Nothing

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Fox News.

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What'd the Jew get for Christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish, remember?

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What's the difference between a fat man and a little boy? Despite the fact that they were dropped on two different cities, one was made out of uranium, the other was made out of plutonium.

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Women's rights

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Why didnt the teenager have a smartphone? He didnt live close to a cell phone store

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To find some grain.

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What do you tell someone who says they are contemplating suicide? where to find some cheap cyanide

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Why does the rabbit go in the hole? because that's where it lives.

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What did the black kid get for his birthday? Yo bike!

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The Braves win the N.L. east

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whats worse than dying alone? dying with a boner.

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A plane full of atheists, with one Christian, crashes into a field over Ohio. Everybody but the Christian dies upon impact. Amazed, a news reporter on the scene of the crash, asks the man, "How did you suvive this tragic event?" "I had a parachute." Responds the man.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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