What did the fish say when it hit the big stone wall? DAM

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What do you call a room full of lawyers? A group of legally educated professionals.

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What didnt rebecca black do today ride the bus

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You just wasted time of your life reading this, and perhaps even more wasted time thumbing this down.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends. How hard can you throw?

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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John and Sarah sitting in a tree. K i s s i n g. First comes love. Oops theres goes john-- he's falling---he's falling... he's broken his neck and ruptured his internal organs. D e a t h

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I really did not understand the chapter. Is there anyway I can meet with you at a later time to discuss what I did wrong?

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What do you get if you have 59 apples in your right hand and 74 pints of ice cream in your right? Large hands.

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What is funnier than onion gravy? Mushroom gravy.

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okay i know you read this far but this is the turning point

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A bar walks into a man. The drink orders a bartender. And then the money walks home. End The.

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Why did the tight shirted Asian man spend all his time on his knees? Because when he was 12 he was forced to work in a textile factory where he lost his lower legs.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Not the Twin Towers.

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Why is siracha taste so good on chicken? Because it compliments the meat.

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Did you hear about the guy who got his entire LEFT side ripped off? He's dead.

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A man walks into a bar... who cares what happens after that Charlie Sheen is winning and Osama Bin Laden is dead

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Near the tower of London, a woman says to her friend: "You know, I had a feeling my son would come out, and the other day, he did." "What was your first clue?" "We're British."

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A brown haired woman walks into a clinic and says, "Doctor it hurts whenever I touch myself." The doctor says, "Strange, I have never heard of such a disease. Please show me." The woman touches her leg and screams,"Ow!" Then she touches her arm and screams again. The doctor asks, "Are you a natural brunette?" The woman replies, "No, I am a blonde." The doctor says, "Oh, that explains it. You have a broken finger. God, you are so blonde." The woman gets her finger treated and then lives in agony for the rest of her life due to her untreated broken leg and arm.

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Q: Why did the man eat the banana? A: Cuz he was hungry!

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Who's there? Knock Knock.

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What did the heart surgeon say to the brain surgeon? We are both surgeons

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There are two types of people in the world: 1. people who can extrapolate from incomplete data And I have two wonderful pieces of advice: 1. Never tell anyone everything you know

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops