Q: Whats worse than 5,000,000 African Americans being killed? A: 1 White person being killed

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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a terrorist walks into a bank and says "gimme all the money or ill kill you" the bank owner said you and what army the terrorist said this army and no one came in buuuut he opened hi jacket and there was a bomb straped to him then he exploded it Buuuuuuut in hell he thinks hang on a minute i didn't get my money oh for goodness sake Buuuuuuuuuuut in heaven the bank man said i still live in a wonderfull place and anywhay we had no money left and i was going to suiside soooooooooooooooooooooooo you done me a favour and if i would of suiside i could of gone to hell but you killed me so i edidnt go to hell buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut you did lol by the way i just wasted your time

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Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

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What does a person and a tree have in common? You can knock them down if you hit them repeatedly with an axe.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Hearing this joke again.

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what happens when you put samuel jackson on a plane with snakes? They make a movie

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What is brown and sticky? A stick

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What did the little gril with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Cancer

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A man looks both ways before crossing the street he gets hit by an airplane

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your birth certificate was an apology letter from the condom factory

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Why didn’t the skeleton go to see a scary movie? Because skeletons don't have eyes, and can not watch movies.

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your mom is so annoying that she has no freinds and lives alone crying every night about how her children abandoned her

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How do you punish Helen Keller? Send her to her room until she becomes civil enough to explain what was causing her misbehavior.

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what's worst than being gay? being black

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What's brown and sticky? Vomit.

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why is everyone always picking on ruth? because they just do

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How do you make a plummer angry? Kill his family

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Would anyone like to contribute to my slush fund?

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I bought my daughter the Josef Fritzl advent calendar. The proceeds go towards abuse survivor charities.

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A man is balancing on a bar. But it's a bar where people drink so I don't know how that works.

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What's sicker than "Friday" by Rebecca Black? Hitler's kill death ratio

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Whats worse than forgetting some thing at the supermarket? your nuts being nail gunned to the wall.

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How do you make a japanese man horny? Mutilate his girlfriend

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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