Penisland

Why did the boy eat the apple. He really likes apples.

Q: What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? A: Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Q: So what's worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? A: The punchline of this joke,

A black guy walks into a bar... *3 hours later* He walks out...

a. how did you shoot the rabbit? b. with my banana

Why did the woman fall off the skateboard? She hit a rock.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Scholars maintain that the translations to the chickens journal were lost in a hurricane hundreds of years ago. Therefore, the chicken crossed the road for unknown reasons and died knowing it had a dull, pointless life.

Why are elephants big, grey, and wrinkly? Because if they were small, round, and white, they would be called 'asprin'.

Steve, what do I write on a 3946 if more than two vehicles were involved?

How many blacks does it take to screw in a light bulb? blacks don't work

How do you help someone stop drowning You take your foot off the back their head.

I had a chocolate chip cookie today, thats it, just a chocolate chip cookie.

Roses are red, Violets are blue At least that's what I've been told But honestly I've never seen those flowers so I wouldn't know.

What did the little boy get after falling and hitting his face on the ground? A prolonged nosebleed. And Leukemia.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because blind people aren't allowed to drive in the United States.

Why did the man suddenly burst into flames in room. The room was dark, so he lit a match. It turns out there was hydrogen in the room and when fire touches hydrogen, it sets on fire.

What do you do when life hands you lemons? Go home, look for the ingredients on which to make proper, delicious lemonade. Afterward, I would go in the front yard, make a stand, then make a sign that says $1.00 lemonade. Then you know make millions on your master-mind plan that no one else ever thought of.

A black man walks into a bar and says, "ouch."

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Your family is dead. Your family is dead, who? Your family is dead.

What's silent but deadly? Limnic Eruption.

charly ate an apple. the apple was filled with poison and charly died.

A man walks into a bar and says Ouch.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a banana.

Why was the school field trip cancelled? The Holocaust.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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