whats worse than being late to school haveing your family killed by an angry peice of toast

Why did the tree stay home from school? Because, trees don't have school.

Why did Sally's Ice Cream melt? Sally was on Fire

How many people does it take to kill the president? A number

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

whats the only concert you can get into for 45 cents? a 50 cent concert featuring Nickelback

What's big and messy? A big mess

whats worse then having sex with a blonde? having sex with a cactus

They say that laughter is the key to a long life. What's the key to a short life? Death.

knock knock who's there Scott, Scott who, Scott Rollheiser stole my joke and posted it here.

we should name the next hurricane alex rodriguez so it dosent hit any thing

why did the girl eat a banana? because she was hungry

why did the boy trip off a cliff? because he was clumsy.

So I went to my grandmothers house at 7 and left at 8.

Why did the turtle cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen

When life hands you lemons... do not squeeze them, for juice may squirt into your eye, causing severe pain.

baby seal walks into a club

What's gray and comes in buckets? An elephant

Why did the cat cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

Know what people hated the most? 9-11

Susan boyle has a belly button, Simon has a belly button, Because its only normal.

Why couldn't the boy sing? The boy could sing, but the thick layer of duct tape prevented him from doing so.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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