Student: May i go to the toilet? Teacher: What for? Student: To open the chamber of secrets!

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How do you get McFly into a Mini? McFly are a four member band and a mini has four seats so it's actually quite straightforward.

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What's worse than hitting your funny bone on a chair............... Hearing one person say "its friday" then realizing that you are now singing

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Two blondes were driving down the road. The blonde driving looks at her friend in the passenger seat and asks her to see if her blinker is working. So the blonde looks out the window and says, ''Yes. No. Yes. No.''

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meh

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What's the difference between a cat and a dog? Dogs taste better in stews.

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Why was 6 scared of me? cause i ate 9

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Why are black people so good at basketball? Hard work and dedication.

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Q:If an apple and an orange had a politicial debate, what would it concern? A:Nothing important.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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What did the wizard say to the man? Wizards aren't real. Thus not able to speak.

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Smeg...

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Roses are Red Violets are Purple Not blue

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Why was the squirrel late for work? Because the traffic was nuts!

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Why did the woman cross the road? She didn't. They are no roads in the kitchen.

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2 persons in an elevator then, one guy says: dude! smells like your sister! and the other guy is not there

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why did the husband always work late nights? he needed the extra hours to provide for his family

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Q: What did the man say when he tried to commit suicide by jumping off a 20 storie building? A: Ow!

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Roses are black Violets are black Grass is blac- Oh wait, it's night time. I'll be back in 12 hours.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I stole all your jokes, I stole this one too.

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Q: What happens when you hit a man with a car? A: You speed away hoping no one saw, you spend the next month and a half agonizing over your crime as it consumes you because you think of the poor man's family, then you either go to prison or hang yourself from a fan all because you wanted road dome....

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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What is black at the bottom, and white at the top? Society.

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Knock Knock Who's There AT&T Guy Mom it's for you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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