Q: What dosent a Jew and a pizza have in commen? A: The pizza dosent scream when you put it in the oven.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r jerks n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

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Why was the boy not feeling well? He swallowed a piano.

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What did the virgin get for her birthday? Aids

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What do Chinese people call Chinese food? Food.

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Why did the man feel so guilty after having sex...... He found out He was a tranny

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How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagen Bug? Four in the seats, twenty six in the ash tray, and thirty in the gas chamber.

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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The internet is the most terrible fucking place in existence.

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Whats pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

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how did they guy with no legs in the wheel chair walk? he couldnt because he had no legs.

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why can't helen keller drive? Because she is deaf and blind.

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A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

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Why don't NBA basketball players shake hands after a game like players in NHL hockey...? ...Because it's a tradition in then NHL.

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My girlfriend once told me " Life is like a penis, it's hard."

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Look in the peephole

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Is the boy sleeping? No, he's dead!

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roses are blue violets are red... i have to use the bathroom

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who's yellow , and looks like a bear? pudsey

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yo momma is so poor that she may not be abe to accumulate the right amount of revenue necessary for your college funding.

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What did the girl say when she arrived at the party? "I like what you did with the furniture!"

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What do you call a man with 3 arms, 6 ears, 9 fingers, and a red clown nose? His name.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a convicted serial killer.

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its my money!, but i dont need it right away

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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