This boy. We shall call him George. George was skating down the street when he passed the market. George stopped and looked in when he saw this SWEET pair of shoes! They were priced for 20 bucks. So George rushed home and went to his dad who was mowing the lawn. "DAD DAD!" "what?" The dad said. "I FOUND THESE SWEET PAIR OF SHOES! Can you lend me 20 bucks?" His dad shook his head and George ran inside the house and went up to his mom who was washing the dishes. "Mom can you lend me 20 bucks for these sweet shoes?" His mom just looked at him funny and said, "No". Angry, George set off upstairs to his sister's room who was on the computer. "Sis can you lend me...." "GET OUT OF MY ROOM!!" She slammed the door in his face. George sighed and went to his room. But before he got to his door, he saw a 20 dollar bill on the floor. He picked it up and rushed to the store. Once he got the shoes he ran back home to his dad. "Dad DAD! Look at these.." He stopped and saw his dad that was under the lawnmower dead. George shrugged and went inside to his mom. "Mom mom! Look at these...." He stopped and saw that his mom was stuffed in the dishwasher, dead. George sighed and ran upstairs to show his sis. "Hey sis look at...." She was found with her head in the computer screen, dead. So George sighed and walked down to the living room. He plumped on the couch and wondered about how his family died. Then there was a knock on the door. George hesitated. It knocked again. He got up and went to the door. Opened it and out stood a penguin. He stared at the penguin. "What do you want?!" The penguin stared back. What did he say?????? Nothing penguins can't talk.

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Why did the african jump in the swimming pool? Because it was a really hot day and he wanted to cool down

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What do you do if a blonde throws a pin at you? Run, 'cause she's got a grenade in her mouth!

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banana

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How many mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Trick question they cant afford one.

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Knock knock. Stop making puns at my door!

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What's worse than stepping on a snail? Stepping on a bear trap.

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What's the difference between 9/11 and Jenga? The World Trade Center wasn't ruined by clumsiness.

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black people

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Their was three black men that walked into a bar. They then ordered three drinks and had sex... I lied about walking into a bar

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What is funny about 9/11. Nothing you sicko, it was a tragic day for the world.

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Dylan is a person

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What does Santa do on Halloween? He gives out candy to the kids who come to his door.

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Why does Spongebob go to work? Because he's ready.

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What did Winnie the Pooh say to Eeyore? Nothing, he just suffocated him in a pot of honey.

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What did the amputee get for Christmas? Shot.

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Why did 16-year-old girl scream in the basement? She was being raped.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because his work office was there and if he had not crossed, he would have had to get back in his car and parked in the company parking space therefore taking more time and costing a small but significant amount of money

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What's black and flies? Whatever it is, it's not a car.

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5

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a horse walks into a blender ow

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why did the kid cross the road he didnt he had no legs

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Whats worse than finding a repeated joke in anti-joke? The Holocaust.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops