The Definition of Megan Bates 800 Hamburgers

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I went to the zoo the other day there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu. By Nathan Luque CARROTS!!!

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Miranda Cosgrove's singing career. ......Thats it. Thats the joke.

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INSULT- You've got a photographic memory, but the lens cap is on. INSULT- Whatever anyone says to you goes in one ear and out the other because nothing is blocking traffic INSULT- I heard you were born, your father threw rocks at the stork. From- Insults and Putdowns lite

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What did the black person say to the tall man with nice shoes? Nice shoes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, a bus hit it half way along and it died instantly.

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Gotta go Fast Gotta go Faster Faster Fasterfasterfaster! Moving at the speed of sound I'm the quickest hedgehog around Got ourselves a situation Start getting a new location Without any explanation On top of relaxation! Go- Go- Go- Don't blink Don't think Just Go go go go G-g-g-g-go go! Sonic, he's on the run Sonic, he's number one Sonic, he's coming next so watch out for Sonic X! Gotta go fast, gotta go faster faster faster fasterfasterfaster Go go go go go go go go go! Sooooniiiiic X!!

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Your mom is so poor, she can't afford nice clothing.

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roses are red violets are blue i have AIDS now so do you.

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What's black and white and red all over? A car in which some young hoodlum appears to have splashed a fair amount of red paint over the owner's otherwise charming checker pattern.

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i feel like when the radish was discovered someone was like "hey lets call it rad!" and another guy was like "lets dial it down a bit"

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Why doesn't Squidward wear pants? Because he's a pervert

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Roses are red. Violets are red. I have a gun. What did i do?

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once upon a time there was a girl named katie. she walked across the road. she got hit by a truck. now she's in heaven. the end,.

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Knock knock whos there? A dead black man ... i farted

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What is blue and rolls ? A blue, rolling thing.

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What happpens when a Jew walks into a wall with a boner? He breaks his nose

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How many jews can fit into a car? 2 in the front, 3 in the back, 6 million in the ash tray

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Why Can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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Whats the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral?? Theres one less drunk.

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What happens when you divide by zero? According to the limits in Calculus, 1/x as x approaches 0 becomes closer to infinity, so we can safely conclude that if we could divide by zero, it would be a form of infinity. Positive infinity for 1/0, negative infinity for -1/0 and unsigned infinity for 0/0, as zero has no sign.

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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? It was a cold day

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Why do gay people go to the beach on memorial? idk im not gay

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 27

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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