A bear walked into a bar, unfortunately there were no survivors.

Knock knock. Come in.

Why was the baby so hot? Napalm. Why was the baby so cold? Meat locker.

Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and oranges? With one,you can make a delicous smoothie, but the other is just a pile of citrus fruits.

A guy walked up to me and said "I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam, I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam." I promptly informed the authorities. He was transported to a mental institution and I later learned that he swallowed his own tongue and died. Nobody attended his funeral.

why did Samantha fall off the building? She was hit by a flying fridge dropped by a traffic helicopter.

Roses are red Violets are blue I am disabled, so please help me poo.

How do you make a clown frown Throw an axe at his face.

Two muffins are in an oven. The first muffin says, "Boy it's hot in here." The second says, "It sure is." Both muffins then faint from heat exhaustion and are eaten to death when taken out of the oven And thus tragically, the world would never know of the spectacular talking muffins.

Did the boy ever tell you how he died? Trick questions he's dead, deceased bodies can't talk.

An early Jewish man walks into a bar where a number of stormtroopers have gathered for drinks and is taken into custody and then delivered by railcar to a camp where he and other persecuted minorities are deliberately imprisoned in a relatively small space with inadequate facilities where they await their mass execution.

Why did the homeless man get a house key cut? He didn't he's homeless.

why did the chicken cross the road? because it had earlier escaped from its cage and had since began to wonder around the local town

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

Whats worse then getting stabbed in the trachea by a aids infected knife? getting pounded anally by satan

Why do black people have the whitest teeth? Because they brush regularly.

Roses are red, violets are blue. I know.

Holy shit Lawman! Next thing we know Nero comes back from the death! Seriously get over here stat and get "my men" under control here! So that last damn Moral was for you! I never understood why he picked me, so he never picked me at all... Man am I relieved! Do you ever fucking get tired of playing the hero? I basically ended up declaring war on Nero`s on people here, what should I do?

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

My friend Edward found a worm in his apple. Edward happened to be a lemur. Lemurs eat both plants and worms, so he ate them both.

What has 3 legs? An abnormal human.

THE GAME

What did the one horse say to the other. Nothing because horses can't talk.

Whats the difference between a house and a truck? Ones a truck the other one is a house

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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