Why was the black man tangled in chains at the bottom of the ocean? Because he was a highly skilled diver and environmentalist who tragically entangled himself and consequently died slowly and painfully of suffocation while trying to save a whale from eating waste metal.

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Sometimes I question my sanity... Occasionally it replies.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy had cancer.

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GIRL: Honey, for a holiday we should go someplace nice BOY: How will that work, none of us speak Mexican...

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What do you call cheese that is not yours? The fact that you do not own the cheese doesnt change its name

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Q: Whats the difference between a friend and a bestfriend? A: The other one has best in front of it dumb A$$

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Why did the fat man hit the ground before the skinny man? Because he jumped first.

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Q.Why did Beethoven kill his chicken? A. It had contracted a serious illness. He had killed it as an act of mercy.

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Why did Charlotte fall off the swing? She got hit in the face with an axe.

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hahahahaha thats not funny

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Q: "How does a monkey hide in a jungle?", A:"Paint its balls red and sit in a cherry tree" , Q:"What is the loudest noise in the jungle?", A: "A native picking cherries"

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why do i love my iphone because its a very versatile electronic device with many uses and i can get the anti-joke app

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What's the square root of 69 Jimmy? Square root of 69 is 8 something right? Cus I've been trying to work it out oh. Jimmy! It's 8.306623863 >.

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Whats the best way to get to a girls heart? A knife.

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Why did Jesus cross the road? He didn't. He's dead.

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What rude names do you call a girl with no limbs? Anything you want they can't touch you

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Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they're ugly and they stink.

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Did you hear about Helen Keller's dog? Neither did she.

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A policeman walks into a bar. He goes inside to greet his friend who happens to be the bartender. Another man walks into the bar. This man is a regular customer and goes to the bar almost every other night. The policeman leaves and goes back on duty.

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Q:what has two legs and bleeds A: a dog cut in half

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When life throws you melons you might be dyslexic.

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What's green and looks like a red apple? A green apple

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What did the turtle say to the hare? Nothing. Animals can't speak.

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osama is obame quincadence or aluminatti????

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops