Why did the cat cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

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How do you make an electrician cry? You kidnap him and his mother, tie them both to chairs in your garage, and force him to watch you stab his mother repeatedly in the face while laughing and licking up her blood and tears. Then cut his arms and legs off, lock him in a cage with his mothers body, and go in there everyday and eat a delicious meal while watching him starve to death next to his dead mother.

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What do you call a puppy that has been left in the cold? A puppsicle

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we should name the next hurricane alex rodriguez so it dosent hit any thing

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What`s red and smells like blue paint? A sunburned baby drinking green paint.

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why did the boy trip off a cliff? because he was clumsy.

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why did the girl eat a banana? because she was hungry

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knock knock who's there Scott, Scott who, Scott Rollheiser stole my joke and posted it here.

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So I went to my grandmothers house at 7 and left at 8.

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Why did the turtle cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.

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Let's go burn down an orphanage, what are they gonna do tell their parents?

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When life hands you lemons... do not squeeze them, for juice may squirt into your eye, causing severe pain.

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Why did the moogle cross the road? Kupo kupo kupopo!

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Jennifer Kim is the nicest person I have ever met, everyone loves her.

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Susan boyle has a belly button, Simon has a belly button, Because its only normal.

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Know what people hated the most? 9-11

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Why couldn't the boy sing? The boy could sing, but the thick layer of duct tape prevented him from doing so.

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What did the camera man say when the actor took off his pants? Why did you take off your pants?

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Why did little Timmy start crying? He was shot.

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An Irishman walks out of a bar

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Roses are black Violets are black Im Helen Keller WWWHHAATTTTT!?!?

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How do you kill 1000 Ethiopians? Push 1000 Ethiopians off a cliff

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A tightly dressed woman walks up to a man and asks if he wants a good time they go out for dinner and have a lot in common and agree to meet again in the near future

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Why did the grandmother lock her grandson in the closet? Because she didn't love him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops