*Pretend your an orphan] Knock knock Who's there? Not your parents.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's red and smells like green paint? The rotting corpse of the old lady I poisoned with green paint.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's worse than a dead baby? 2 dead babies

thumb_up thumb_down +22

scenario: retarded monkey upside down in a mirror question: why is jims dad fat answer: the mexican chicken is an aperadus

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why was Tigger looking in the toilet? He was looking for pooh

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's the difference between a dead baby and a pineapple? There will be no funeral for the pineapple..

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What did the homeless man do with his trolley full of aluminium cans, He took them to the scrapyard and sold them as this is his only source of income right now

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How do you hack into someone's computer? A few good hits with a hatchet should do the trick

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Onions are like loved ones... They are both nouns. And you cry when you cut into them.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How do you get money out of a Jew? You convince him your cause is worthwhile.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

their were 2 muffins. one said hello how are you. the other screamed "A TALKING MUFFIN"

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because 2.5 million children in the world are suffering from HIV/AIDs.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The barman says "What is this? A joke?" They then proceed to rape the barman.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

ROSES ARE RED WATCHES ARE GOLD GET ON YOUR KNEES AND DO WHAT YOUR TOLD

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How do you keep a puppy warm? You throw it in the fire...

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's big and messy? A big mess

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you get when you cross a turtle and a kangaroo? A hybrid combination of the two that is characterized by specific traits of both animals.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

i read the terms of service when i posted this

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you get when you cross a muslim and a mexican? i don't know, i just thought that this would make an interesting question.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did the hooker get for christmas? Herpes

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops