s o m a a d i t u n y s n i t a c s d c ' s k h k s t o e l y e

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A man walks into a bar. He sees two horses, and about 15 other men in there which seem to have their own ethnicity and religion preferences. About 20 people on the sidelines were on anti-joke.com, writing down these jokes. About two leave at the same time, noticing that there is a horse in the bar. The man goes outside. Five swingsets are right next to each other, and some kids with no arms or no legs cannot swing. They are also being called names. An old adult is climbing a telephone pole with a backpack full of bananas. Also, a boy drops his ice cream after getting hit by a bus. And at the same time, he notices that most of these are better than the holocaust. He thinks, "do I live in Crazytown?" Well, he does.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

No really, try this: You: Say "knock, knock" Your friend: OK, knock knock You: Who's there? Your friend: ...... [this awkward pause makes evident the fact that it has now dawned on your friend that he has to generate content for a joke that he wasn't telling in the first place]

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How do you make a dyke moan? Insert a BEAVER in it!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did the toaster say to the raisin? Nothing. The toaster was mute and the raisin had lost his hearing in a terrible full-contact origami accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's the difference between a black man and a Jew? Their ancestral heritage

thumb_up thumb_down -21

" Whats the deal with airline food? " -Sharon

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did Billy drop his ice cream? He found out his family was killed in a terrorist attack.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

I don't always drink beer but when I do, I viciously beat my wife and children.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Q. At the main menu why are there two people sad? A. Because there is.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What did the ketchup say to the mustard? Nothing they're just condiments.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

they call me the green lantern because my little sister died in chemical fire

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Q: What did the boy say to his mum when he saw a Lion A: Hey mum that's a Lion

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Old Macdonald had dyslexia IE IE O

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why didn't the boy eat his food? because he wasn't hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the ocean say to the black guy? Nothing, it just shot him.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Stoner Student: "Imagine if El Nino and La Nina got together and started a family and had little Los Ninos." Class Nerd: "Yeah."

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Joker2? Who comes up with the names anyways? Sounds like a stupid version of the matrix... Anyways, I stutter because my nerves are killing me, I cant quit the painkillers cold turkey if I cant sleep without them, besides I am used to physical pain as tragic as that might sound... Its not when you get used to it. I need to know who this Neo-Nero was, for anyone that can tell me, he is not around here at these hours, and during the time he/she I was dead, did considerable damage to my and my orders reputation, I need a face to face talk to someone that would put aside my chosen successor and assume my role, and I wont let that happen again even if it means bruising up this Neo-me a bit.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

whats black and white and covered in blood Michael Jackson being stabbed

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q:What did the Black man say to New York? A: Black Out.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

you know what they say, Big man, Big hypertrophic cardiomyopathy, shame he died

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Roses are red violets are flowers jordan and me did it for hours If you know what i mean xxx

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops