Q: What happened when three lions escaped from the zoo? A: Animal patrol came and tranquilized all three.. Unfortunantly one of the lions died from to much tranq.

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a guy jumped out of a plane...he died

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How does your sister ride a bicycle? My sister does not have any legs.

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-if you're American in the kitchen, British in the living room, what are you in the bathroom? -in the bathroom.

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Whats Yellow and has arms. A lemon i lied about the arms.

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Why did the man suck at basketball? Because he is white, 5 foot 2, and has no arms. Posted By: Lram

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What's worse than the holocaust? anti-joke

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man returned and said, "My friend does not have a pulse and he is not breathing, so I stand by my prior assumption."

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How do you kill an Asian? Poke him with a large fork until hes dead.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a grizzly bear in your apple

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Roses are red violets are orange......... Wait did I do that wrong?

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A man rode into town on Friday and stayed a while and then left on Friday how did he manage this?

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What do you get when you cross a turtle and a kangaroo? A hybrid combination of the two that is characterized by specific traits of both animals.

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Why did the elephant cross the road? To run away from the angry chicken who was mad that he was slacking off work.

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What's funnier than poop? More poop

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What's the difference between God and Kanye West? God doesn't think he's Kanye West.

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A homosexual walks into a church

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A blonde and a brunette are stuck on a desert island, they later died of starvation.

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How did the man die? He was killed alive.

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What do you call Batman and Robin after they are run over by a steam roller? Dead

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Why did Martin go to school with no pants on? Because he had no legs.

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bergin y u so tubbbbbyyyy?????

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What's similar about a fish and an eagle? They can both fly, except for the fish.

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What's the difference between a Jew that is half Jewish and a Jew that is fully Jewish? 1/2

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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