There was an american man on the way to work.

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roses are red, violets are blue, f*** you wh*re

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Why did the turtle cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.

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Three jews walk into a bar. The bar is hosting a bar mitzvah.

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Why did the baby die? Because he was shot in the hea repeatedly

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What's the difference between your cat and mine? Yours has legs.

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Knock knock Who's there? I Love You! -Harrison

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Roses are red, Violets are unicorns, This s h i t doesn't make sense, Refrigerator.

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Why didn't Rebecca Black take the bus? Because she would have had a heart attack with all of the seat choices.

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What's the heaviest part of an elephant? Its body.

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Why did the soviet plane crash? It was joseph Stallin

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What's spotted and has dildos strapped to their neck? Jews

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(402)217-6102 that is Jesse

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Where's Waldo? It is impractical to search for him because he's just going to get lost on another page once you find him. You assume he was murdered and get on with your life.

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Your momma's so stupid that she was declared mentally retarded by her doctors.

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Brad Fuller!

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So a dog walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Quickly, someone give me the number for animal control."

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What's worse than going in the wrong direkshun? ...My spelling

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What do you say to a black man with a gun? Don't shoot me.

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While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

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A fifteen-year-old walks into a bar. He is told to leave by the tender because of his obvious prepubescent appearance, deeming him far from the legal age of drinking.

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What do you call a black person driving a plane? A pilot, because you dont want to call him anything racist i mean he is driving you up 25,000 ft in the air and the last thing you want is for him to get mad and decide to do something rational, God, you racists.

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? This joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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