I'M THE GRAPIST!! I'M GONNA GRAPE UR MOM AND UR DAD AND UR WHOLE FAMILY!!!

Why did they monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

when i go to a nude beach people think im looking for lost jewelery and treasure

What color do you get when you mix blue and red? Purple.

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

What do you get when you cross a horse and a donkey? a mule

a horse nibbled a baby

How did the fat guy die? After an autopsy, it was discovered he was unaware of his type 2 diabetes and therefore did not treat it

How do you kill zombie Jesus? You can't.

So there's this crazy married couple in a old trailer down the road. They are both drunk. The man asks his blond wife, ''Isn't it about time we get married?'' The wife replies ''I wouldn't marry a ugly thing like you!'' The next day, they file a divorce.

What did the black kid get for his birthday? Yo bike!

what do you call mexicans in a circle around a house? a spicket fence

Know what people hated the most? 9-11

Why do black people eat so much fried chicken? Because it's delicious!

A man walks into a bar. Ouch

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

Tic tac toe. I never met my father

ass.

Kathy Griffin.

A gentleman walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "What can I get for you?" The gentleman replys that he would like a beer. After the bartender fulfils the gentleman's order, the gentleman drinks his beer and enjoys it.

Why did suzy not eat her breakfast? because i stapled her to the table.

"Look me in the eye" said Cyclops.

How do you kill a ninja? Shoot it.

Little girl and a pedofile walk into the woods at night. Little girl says, "mr pedofile im scared" pedofile responds " you think your scared? i have to walk out of here alone."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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