A man walks into a bar. His alcohol dependency is tearing his family apart.

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Q: Where is the best place to hide a black persons food stamps? A: In their wallet so they can go to the grocery store and support their family with the little amount of help they get.

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Q. How do you get a dinosaur off a slide? A. You tell him he hasn't lived for billions of years.

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A tree fell in the forest. The person in the house it hit heard it.

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Knock knock. who's there? Strawberry! Strawberry who? Pickle!

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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Two men walk into a bar. It turns out the bar was a lever and set off a bomb. They both died.

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Q:why did the man jump of the house A:he did not I threw a frige at him

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Your mama's so stupid... She scored below average on a recent IQ test.

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What's worse than a bad test score? Getting hit buy a train!!

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What did the Wife say to her husband about his Erectile Dysfunction? - Im sorry I dont know how to finish a joke based on this private a matter.

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how do you make a plumber cry? you kill his whole family

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will have her institutionalized as soon as they find her.

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The Game

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Two cowboys are in a kitchen. The first one says, "I feel at Home on the range!" To which the second replies, "Is that because of your extensive culinary background?" The first cowboy breaks down in tears because he has never pursued his real dream.

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What do you call a politician on fire? A tragic death for the American public..

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Yo momma's so bulimic, and there's nothing funny about it at all.

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Man 1: WHAT THE HELL?!?! Man 2: There is no verb in that sentence

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What do a black man and an apple have in common? They are both carbon based life forms.

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What's faster than a Jew running after a penny? A car.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing Because she had no arms. Knock knock... Whose there... Not Susie Why did the plane crash Susie was flying it

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Herpes, Now you do too.

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Q: what did the nazi say to the other nazi A: hallo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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