What do a fish and a moose have in common? They both live under water, apart from the moose.

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A man starts acting weird in a resturant, the waiter says "whats the problem sir?" The man says "I'm choking and I just died."

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Two gay men walk into a bar. Holding hands.

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If Jimmy has $5, and he finds $20 on the street, how much money does Jim have? None. He was mugged by a black man.

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you are as stupid as alec. lol neewb

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Dear People who are reading this, I am seriously considering suicide. My Mom beats me and my Dad rapes me in the butthole until i bleed. I have no friends and the only way i get my nut off is if it is into a napkin. I often put peanutbutter on my ballsack and have my dog lick it off. It is the only time that i am happy. I have the gun to my head right now and if you wanna talk me out of it. I live in Lincoln, Nebraska. My number is (402)713-9565. Hurry before i run out of time...... and tears. Sincerely, Adam Claypool

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What do you call an asian man driving a plane? Well you can't drive planes

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Madeline McCan

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stinky boner

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How many Polacks does it take to change a lightbulb? Two, one to change the lightbulb, one to hold the ladder.

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What's better than being raped by a donkey? Pie.

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How did they wake up Lady Gaga? They p-p-poked her face p-p-poked her face......!

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Bake until golden at 375

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What do you call a dog that's having a stroke? An emergency animal hospital.

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There were three people on an airplane. A Mexican, an American and an Italian. The plane chrashed and they all died.

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hohifooncuiohicvsdhn ioshd

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What happened to the boy after he ate a piece of Halloween candy? He died. It was laced with cyanide.

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Cleavlin has a shmaaala dik

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How do you finish your homework? Get your dog to eat it.

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My dog has no nose! Then how does he smell? Terrible!

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what do you call a black man being hung from a tree? -prejudice

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How do you drop a raw egg on to the floor without cracking it? Any way you want, it is very hard to crack concrete.

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First speaker: "why are there so many anti-jokes about something walking into a bar!?!? Second speaker: "there are only a couple thousand of them." First speaker: "it is getting so damn annoying!" Second speaker: "Well, that's too bad for you" The first speaker proceeds in stabbing himself with a knife while laughing hysterecly. First speaker: "ha ha ha ha" Second speaker "emo."

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Yo momma is so fat that we are incredibly concerned for her health.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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