What's worse than finding a repeated joke on Anti-Joke? Your family being massacred in front of your eyes.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms

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Why does Shaun's dad beat him? Because Shaun is an asshole.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Stolen.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had already looked both ways and there was no traffic.

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A man walks out of a bar followed by the people he came with because they just announced "last call". The man is the designated driver for the night.

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What kind of "room" can you not enter? One with a locked door.

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how many jews can you fit in an oven? -well zero because the conventional oven cannot fit a full sized human

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a man is stranded on a deserted island with no food, water or clothing and he comes upon a magical genie lamp, a genie pops out and tells him that he has three wishes, the man asks for food,water, and clothing, the genie says "of course" the man was elated but then the genie says " but i'm afraid to tell you that genies don't exist and your hallucinating from your harsh living conditions...i'm sorry" the man lived two more weeks before dying slowly...

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An irish man calls a black man a nigger. The offended black man then proceeds to ravenously beat the Irish man's head into a nearby curb.

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Whats blue and fuzzy? blue fuzz.

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A man walks into a bar.... no wait! It's a horse! A man walks into a horse...

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My cat used to be afraid of storms. But now it's dead.

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How do you get rid of a stalker? You throw a fridge at them!

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1,984

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How many ants does it take to fill an apartment? It depends on the size of the apartment.

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A black man walked into a bar. Had a drink, and left.

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"I have been threw the desert with a horse with no no name" wrong the horse, name was no name

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Kill me? Lol, come get me sis, I can kill you wit my mullet, nobody wants to take my phone, but your sister already replied to my "anna fuck" with "arent you married buddy? :)" yeah a smiley, ill show you! The doors are open, if I fail to take you out, I am not deserving of living futher, course yea mother blusx to everywown, I mean she is horny all the tiem! Anywaz, hurry up, im out of stims so im fallin sleeps, told ur sis to send me a nude pic, rite now... so this mite take 3 minuts. Hey, watch the next pic im gonna send you, that should motivate you to fight me sersly, i men sure im slo, but imma sp ful ov valeium dat i feel nor feear no pain... never feeer pain so whateves... Nah your sis is skinny, thats not here, the pixture is fakye, for now... u dyou know dat she keeps snending them hearte and smile and even a smilei with a rose, thats FLIRIIIIIING! Flirting, anyway you get the picture, but I wont respon anymor becuz i am shuttin down this pc and gonna dream abot the things to0 you sis. ;)

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-I once had a dog with no legs, and do you know how I named him? -...? -I didn't name him, he wouldn't come...

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What do you call a black person that flies a plane? A pilot.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dog, which also fell out of the tree.

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Whats the worst part about being fat. Your fat.

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Why did Jake not get on the bus? Answer: Because Jake is a dog. Dogs are not allowed on the bus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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