What's the only thing a Black Hole can't absorb? Nothing. It absorbs everything, even light.

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Person 1-How do you spell pulmonary embolism? Person 2-P-U-L-M-O-N-A-R-Y E-M-B-O-L-I-S-M. Person 1- Thanks. Person 2- Your Welcome.

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What did the boy with no arms get in his Christmas card? We don't know, he's yet to open it.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Knock Knock. Whose there? The Police, you wife died in a car accident.

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How do you shoot a basketball? With your hands

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A guy walks into a bar, and says, "The Aristocrats!"

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Why did the man walk into the bar? To purchase alcoholic beverages ready for consumption.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting cow. Interrupting cow who? I didn't do it right.

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What did the blind orphan get for christmas? Cancer

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Hey, you know what sucks about being blind? You can see.

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name one thing that is impossible!! A sober irishman

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Whats the worst thing about seeing a truck being snapped in half? It was mine

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Why was the boy hit by a bus? Because the driver is a homicidal sociopath.

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What's inside that man's house? Atoms.

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when life throws you lemons your an idiot because it wont

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a man with a serious lung diesease was brought into a hospital, through continuous care they were not able to save him and he died the following morning.

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What's green and fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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Q: What's the capital of Ohio A: O

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knock knock who's there i lost my wallet my nan died

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I am iron man 24 flavors in my van i am the icecream man i have met jackie chan

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you: "hey, is your refrigerater running?" random, confusded individual: "yeah" you: "oh."

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So a guy with ADD walks into a... Hey Look! A Chicken!

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What rhymes with orange? Somalia.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops