what do you call a drunk person? By his or her name and call him a cab

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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your mommas so fat i like fat cows is she home?

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Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

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How do you make Chuck Norris cry? Kill his family.

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Why did the hamster not eat it's food? Because it wasn't hungry.

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What do you call two black men and a hispanic man in the back of a car? The punchline of this joke is offensive, and might bring legal troubles to Anti-Joke.Com and it's subsidiaries. For these reasons, Anti-Joke.Com will not allow it to be shown.

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A bear walked into a bar, unfortunately there were no survivors.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What's the best way to pick up girls? Lift with your legs, not your back.

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Q. Whats green jumps up and down and then red? A.A frog in a mixer

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nobody cause your a loser.

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where do you find sunglasses at? the store

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Why was the man thought to be peculiar? Because he had sex with a pistachio.

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Why did the blonde get fired from the M&Ms factory? Because she slapped the boss when he made a pass at her. Afterwhich she reported the incident to her Union and the boss was fired for Sexual Harassment. She was then rehired with a substantial increase in salary.

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What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs is both the same.

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What do you call a doctor whos black A doctor

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your momma is so fat that she thinks someone hugs her each time she passes through a door

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Do you know the muffin man? No

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Why did the man starve to death? Because his wife died

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Q:what has two legs and bleeds A: a dog cut in half

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A blode takes a trip to her favorite restaurant. She arrives safely. After consuming a delicious meal she dies of cancer.

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Whats the difference between an oven and a fridge One is hot and the other is cold

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What does it smell like, what does it feel like, do you like it? Yes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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