Why couldn't the convicted felonist come back to America? He lost his passport.

How do you make a professional gamer cry? You burn his house down.

Two giraffes walk into a bar, hit their heads, cracktheir skulls and die.

knock knock

What did the man get when he returned from Africa? AIDS

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she was deaf and blind and would have been a hazard to herself and others.

a woman leaves the kitchen.......

Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and trampoline? Well, children jump on one to obtain enjoyment, while a pile of dead babies is a sick tragedy.

What's long and hard? The Ap European exam that i just took.

What do you call a black man running with a TV? A hard working individual who is in a rush to watch his new TV that he bought.

Q:What Did The Man Say When He Lost His Body A:Nothing He Die. Because If You Ever Lost Your Body You Would Die...

If a quiz is a quizzical what is a test? A testicle

Who could be happier than a kid at a candyshop? A necrophiliac in a morgue

Why did the black man cross the road? Black people don't exist.

What has two legs and is covered in red. Half a dog.

What do you call cheese that is not yours? The fact that you do not own the cheese doesnt change its name

Q: Why was 6 afraid of 7? A: Cus 7 had AIDS and it was bleeding all over the place!

Why was Shane cool... Because he was a cool bean.

An asian man and his friend walk into a bar. They both order a few drinks and drink them responsibly. They then pay for their drinks, and drive home to their loving families.

What battle did Napoleon die in? His last one.

Why did the fat man hit the ground before the skinny man? Because he jumped first.

Q: "How does a monkey hide in a jungle?", A:"Paint its balls red and sit in a cherry tree" , Q:"What is the loudest noise in the jungle?", A: "A native picking cherries"

Why don't women need watches? Because they probably have a cell phone, which works just as well.

What's the difference between Hitler and Stalin? Nothing because pineapples aren't vegetables.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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