Why did the black guy still have price tags on his clothes? He forgot to take them off.

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Yo mama's so fat, that when she jumped, gravity pushed her back to the floor!

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You know I can, and I already have, as once the mind knows its getting certain medications, it spends the energy required in order to achieve the effect, this is what psychiatrists and those assholes would call "psychological effect". With that said, I am still tired, and the stimulants are waking up my ouchies too, so I think ill get some sleep and dont worry, I can sleep with any stimulants as long as I can use my mind. By the way, my "hypnosis senses" are not hypnosis by themselves, but in order to hypnotize oneself and other, one must learn to read body language and stuff like that, something which I now do subconciously because I am experienced. Alice is calm again, her hands are shaking but she is cold, I am pretty sure she is far more tired than I am, so I kinda ordered her to go home, this guy can type for me. Just want you to know that I am doing fine now, and that the PTSD is much less severe than before as my brain no longer remembers the voice and looks my parents had back then, so I just feel my nose getting punched and breaking, its... Surprisingly annoying, so ill get some sleep, if nothing else it will help Alice get better, and I wont lie, I need it.

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Rigo your a stupid ass

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what did johnny's mom do for his 50th birthday? she died

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Why, apples are the optimum environment for the worm species, offering a stable temperature with the efficiency of nutrition and comortable value, therefore in reality finding a worm in your apple is a healthy suggestion that the Global Warming effects on Earth have not yet affected the ever increasing innocent worm population.

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a hobo begs and begs for a dollar to buy something. a man finally gives him a dollar. what does the hobo buy? nothing. he walked into 711 and got shot.

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what is long hard and full of seamen......... A sumbirine..........................(what were you thinking)

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Knock knock! Who's there? The police, your entire family has died in a terrible car accident.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her...

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Why did the little boy drown? He was stapled to a whale.

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Wanna hear a joke? 9-11

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what do you call a kid without arms and legs? Freak

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what starts with b and ends with itch pickle

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Where did Suzie go during the bombing? Everywhere. -Tag

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i once thought i could do crytal meth but then i thought naw better not

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A man walked into a bar. It was very crowded so he decided to leave.

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why did the pirate have a patch? to crack the software he had downloaded

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Are you from Tenessee? I heard you were from there

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Knock Knock. *Silence* Knock Knock. *Silence* Knock Knock. *Silence* *Busts open door* "Oh right... I killed Bob last week.

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EGGPLANT

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A blonde walks into a library. She is a commerce major.

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On the 12th day of Christmas my true love gave to me nothing because I'm single

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Have you ever seen Hellen Keller's house? Well it was really nice.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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