Why did the man put his penis in the baby? Because it's warmer than a watermelon.

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more chocolate?

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michael: How old do I look? stranger: about 68? How old are you? michael: I cant remember I have alzheimers. michael: How old do I look?

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A pig, a chicken, and a cow are born on 3 separate barns. They are raised by old men who subside off the grains of the field. When the animals mature, the farmers will butcher the pig, slaughter the chicken, and gut the cow. The farmer who raised the chicken may enjoy a few eggs first but the animals will all die eventually. Either of natural causes or more likely being butchered for profit. Cows make milk.

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What happens when Darth Vader farts? Nothing. Darth Vader's butt was burned off on the volcanic planet of Mustafar and he fell into a lava pit. Darth Vader has since started a program called Darth Vader's butt replacement research foundation. Please donate money today. You could be changing a buttless person's life. Thank you very much.

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Why didn't the cat eat its supper? It was dead.

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dildos are red, vaginas are blue, mother, what have I done to you?

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Roses are red. I have OCD. That rose IS red right.. Let me check again.

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Luke Hardie is G@Y

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An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The barman notices this rather humorous cliche and proceeds to point it out, laughs are shared by all.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies " My daughter just died of leukemia."

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What's larger than a grandmother clock? Plenty of things.

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Why did the homeless man kill his dog? Because a drunk rich guy said he'd pay him a hundred dollars if he did.

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How do you kill a blonde? You shoot them in the head with a revolver.

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Why couldn't the young pirate get in to the movie? Because he wasn't old enough.

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What has four legs, and smells when it's wet? A wet dog.

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Why did the fat chick have a camel toe? She was half camel

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Q. What happened first The Tree or The Apple. A. Johny Appleseed.

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What do you call a dog eating a dead dog? A hungry dog

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what the **** is wrong with kieran scotts forhead!

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Whats Something everyone has except david? Money.

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Shaniqua: Knock knock Random black guy: Who is there? Shaniqua: It's me your girlfriend I had a really nice meeting with my dick Random black guy:What?

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What did the duck get for Christmas. A potato. Not really it got nothing because it's a duck

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Why did the black kid fail his math test? Because he had down syndrome

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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