Why are black people black? They're not. They're brown you idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why was the little boy crying? Because a stranger shoved explosives up his butthole.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's worse than being the last man on earth with thousands of women to please? Realizing that you are gay and there are no men left.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A mosquito flies into a bar and orders a bloody mary, the bartender then takes out a swatter and kills the pest. Noticing the event, the patrons cheer and continued drinking their frothy beverage. Minutes later, the phone rings and the bartender answers the phone. "Hello?" "Hi, I'm looking for a friend of mine, is he there?" "Let me check, by the way, what's his name?" "Jack Hoff" "One sec. HEY FELLAS(yelling over the noisy bar), IS THERE A JACK HOFF HERE? I NEED A JACK HOFF! ANYONE?" Mr. Hoff, sitting at the bar hears this and asks, "who is it?" "He said he's a friend of yours!" "Which one?" " He said his name's Dick Stroker and he needs help on something hardhe'll meet you around back." "Oh ok, thanks."

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a grizzly bear in your apple

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What is pink, smelly, and sometimes gets wet? A pink sponge.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

doctor doctor i have been having a sore head recently . doctor : have you hurt your head yes

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Your momma's so fat that she has a body fat percentage of 37 and is clinically overweight.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A blonde and a brunette are stuck on a desert island, they later died of starvation.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A man tells the bartender," A bar walks into a man..." The bartender says," What the hell? I think you've had enough"

thumb_up thumb_down +15

bergin y u so tubbbbbyyyy?????

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock... Knock... Who's there? AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? usually one new yorker.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. (do you get it cause the robot has no arms)

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Do you want to hear a joke?!?!?!?!?!?! A happy orphan

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the turtle cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the man cross the road? Because the light turned green

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the chicken cross the road? No reason.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A dyslexic woman goes into a saloon and asks for a hair cut. Oh right, she doesn't have hair! Then why the f*** would she enter the saloon? Because she wanted to get her nails done. But she doesn't have nails either, and she doesn't want to drink. She came there because she wanted to hook up with a guy!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

what happened to the farm animals? They were slaughtered and their parts were sold as meat, glue and other useful materials

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q:Which do you take out more...trash or recycle? A: Greenery

thumb_up thumb_down +15

what did the boy with no hands get for christmas Gloves!!! just kidding i dont know he hasnt opened the box yet

thumb_up thumb_down +15

a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops