What is worse than getting stung by a bee? Watching your mother getting raped by your sister.

Knock knock Get off my porch.

when does lady gaga wake up? when she dreams about a bad romance

I slipped and fell in the shower today. Good thing my dad caught me

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He threw it, because he had parkinson's!

what do you call postman pat after he's retired? Pat.

What's it called when Justin Bieber has sex? Sex. The specific person partaking in sexual intercourse does not change the term used to describe it.

What did the farmer say to the cow on the roof? Get off the roof.

Woman rights.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died! Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey!!

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven ate the chicken.

Three men were lost in a desert when a genie appeared and granted them each a wish. they died of dehydration shortly afterward, never realizing they were hallucinating.

Once upon a time, there was a a loving couple. When they first kissed, the girl's heart skipped a beat, but it wasn't because of love. It was a heart murmur. She died. The end.

whats your moms inside look like nick because all there is is fat

Why can't Hellen Keller play hide and go seek? Because she is dead.

Moo! I'm a goat!

Some people like melon and others like soup.

Why'd the chicken cross the road? The chicken doesnt understand the concept of a street so it was most likely just wandering across the street

What did the vegitarian order for dinner? Vegatables

What's the difference between an ostridge? It can neither fly.

A man rode into town on Friday and stayed a while and then left on Friday how did he manage this?

What's the difference between an ostridge? It can neither fly.

Roses are red Violets are blue NO SHIT EINSTEIN!

A homosexual walks into a church

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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