What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

How do you confuse an idiot? By confusing an idiot.

Why did the beachball get sad after it was deflated? Beachballs don't have emotions.

Why was the mom crying? Her son was found in the oven.

What's the difference between a duck? Nothing, they're both the same.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Realizing on your deathbed that you regret the life you've lived and hate the person you've become.

James' father died from being overweight. The next day in the mail, James received a coupon for Skinny's garcinia cambogia pills to help him lost weight. Simply put, it was not a good day for James.

Why did the black man wash up on shore? He was on a boating trip, deep sea fishing, with some close friends from high school. About half of a mile off shore his ship crashed and sunk to the bottom of the ocean. Sadly, not everyone lived this through this tragic accident. This man was one of them.

Why did little Billy fall off his bike? Anwser: because a refridgator hit him.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

What do a plane and a flight attendant have in common? They're both going somewhere in their careers. Aside from the flight attendant.

What do u call a man with no arms and no legs and is laying in front of a door? Matt

A teenage girl walks into a dark alley. She emerges on the other side completely unharmed.

A blind man walks into a bar. He didn't know there was a step and tripped loudly. Other bargoers saw this and helped him up, he was given a beer on the house.

Hey I just met you and this is crazy, but Im on bath salts, and you're face looks tasty;)

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Hit by a bus Why did the bus driver drop his coffee? He hit the boy

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

A mouse sniffed a peice of cheese. It was on a mouse trap and then it died in the trap.

which sex position produces the ugliest children? go ask ur mom

69

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, Show me your ti ts.

What do you call cheese that is not yours? The fact that you do not own the cheese doesnt change its name

How many light bulbs does it take to screw a blonde? 3.

heres a funny joke your momas so fat............

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...