what do obama and terrorist have in common -they are both human

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Why is a chicken coupe, a coupe not a sedan? Because a sedan would have four doors.

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whats long and pointy and guys always have to brag about whos got the biggest one? their christmas trees

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Saying "MY MOM" everyone time ur asked a question

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Why did Billy fail his math quiz? Because he's stupid.

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What happened to the boy who ditched his friends and lied to them...? His appendix exploded.

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Q.Whats the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? A. I don't were my cleats on my trampoline.

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what do you call a black man being hung from a tree? -prejudice

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Do you play piano? No

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Why does jim never go to McDonalds? his wife got shot there.

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Sarah Palin, George Bush Jr and Glenn Beck are having a massive orgy with an illegal mexican immigrant, a member of the NAACP and an empathetic selfless homosexual democrat...no condoms were used because only felatio and cunilingus was being performed...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? WHO CARES!!

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What did the cat say to the elephant? Meow.

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"Do you wanna hear a funny joke?" Yeah, Sure! "A funny joke."

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What's spotty, can be found everywhere and is largely unpopular? Nothing.

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You are so stupid you should go to school and get an education so you are able to get a well paying job in this tough economy

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how do you make a plumber cry? you kill his whole family

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what's silver and red and keeps crashing into the walls? a baby with forks in its eyes

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Your mom is so ugly that she was mercilessly bullied throughout high school which led to severe depression and low self-esteem, however she went to college, got a career, found a man who loved her for who she is, not how she looks, and raised a family happily ever after.

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what did bob say to joey, nothing joey's dead

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Why did John go outside? His house was on fire.

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Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? Because he crossed the road

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Milkman! Milkman who? ....Timmy....I've been coming here for FOURTEEN YEARS! AND YOU CAN'T EVEN REMEMBER MY NAME?!?! I drove your mom to the hospital when you were born since your father is such a deadbeat. I helped pick out your name!! I'm sorry I wasn't born into wealth like you. I'm sorry I have to go door to door handing out milk for other people! I have been coming here every week for FOURTEEN YEARS! But no Timmy, no, don't try to remember my name. Just forget about all the laughs we have had. Or that time i left my family on Christmas because your mother needed me to go find you that Turbo man doll. I saved you from a burning vehicle! I helped you win your third grade science fair! Remember? I have a picture of us and that robot right here in my wallet. I show it to people all the time! Here's me and my...my pal Timmy. Well Timmy, this is it. You shan't see me again.

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How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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