what's black and blue and red all over? nothing, you're and idiot.

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How do you teach a black guy to swim? You sign him up for swimming lessons.

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MAGHBERRY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

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What's worse than the holocaust? anti-joke

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What's black and bleeding? Who cares?

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What's red and smells like green paint? The rotting corpse of the old lady I poisoned with green paint.

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hey i just met you.... and this might just sound crazy but i have a bad case of short term memory .....were we talking????

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Meh, I dont want it anymore! You can have it.

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Your momma's so fat that she has a body fat percentage of 37 and is clinically overweight.

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Roses are red violets are blue some poems rhyme but this one doesn't

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Q: What did the latino kid get for christmas? A; Nothing because he died two days before

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Why do penguins wash their clothes in tide? They don't. As artic-dwelling birds, they don't have access TV or magazines and as such, are impervious to influences via commercials and written advertisements. Also, obvious tuxedo jokes aside, they don't really wear clothes.

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Why do African-American people like fried chicken and watermelon? Because they are delicious food items.

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What's the difference between Hitler and Stalin? Nothing because pineapples aren't vegetables.

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a slice of tomato A really bad joke

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How Many Blondes does it take to open a fridge. 1 Because most blondes are smart and can open fridges.

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What happened to the little kid who went surfing? Answer: he gOt eaten by a shark

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what do you say to a girl dog crying??? shut up bitch...

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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? usually one new yorker.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It died. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure.

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what does gum eat ? gum you idiot!

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Why did the chiken cross the road? To bite a rubarb stick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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