Two cows are in a field. Suddenly, from behind a bush, a rabbit leaps out and runs away. Martin was a lonely man

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"life is like a box of chocolates", except you cant eat life and hocolate doesnt rain on you.

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you know whats better than lemonade? sex

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What do you call a black cop? Officer.

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Q: why do irish people like swimming A: because it's fun

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Q: What is the leading cause of pedophilia? A: Sexy children.

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What do an eagle and a gopher have in common? They can both fly, except for the gopher

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I LIKE TRAINS

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How did little Timmy die? He was ripped to shreds by a violent badger.

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What do you call a Pokemon without a trainer? A wild pokemon.

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Why did the Asian woman crash her car? She couldn't see through the slits she called eyes.

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selena gomez & justin beiber go in space. selena says im hotter than the sun. the way she knows this information is that she is near the sun at this time justin beiber has already drifted of in space.

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I told you it would happen

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what do you call a girl with no arms and legs whatever her name is

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A helicopter was flying around above Seattle when an electrical malfunction disabled all of the aircraft's electronic navigation and communications equipment. Due to the clouds and haze, the pilot could not determine the helicopter's position. The pilot saw a tall building, flew toward it, circled, and held up a handwritten sign that said "WHERE AM I?" in large letters. People in the tall building quickly responded to the aircraft, drew a large sign, and held it in a building window. Their sign said "YOU ARE IN A HELICOPTER." The pilot smiled, waved, looked at his map, determined the course to steer to SEATAC airport, and landed safely. After they were on the ground, the copilot asked the pilot how he had done it. "I knew it had to be the Microsoft Building, because they gave me a technically correct but completely useless answer."

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Sticks and stones can break my bones Well maybe you shouldn't play in the tree anymore

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

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Why was the ginger walking around in bare feet? He had no sole.

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The big male boar went out the forest, saw a group of women and start to swank.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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What is the square-root of pi? ?pi

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Why did the child get hit by a bus? He was blind.

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your momma is so dumb.. ... because she was a slacker in high school but then turned her life around and is now a respected member of society

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she was blind and deaf which impairs the ability to register sights and sounds necessary to operate an automobile.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops