If i could rearrange the alphabet, i'd put my penis in your mouth

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What can you conclude about a black man in a mercedes? He has crack and car insurance.

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What kind of coins to you find at the bottom of the ocean? Wet coins.

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Why is Steven so gay? Because hes actually Richard Simmons

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Roses are red Violets are tits I like tits Tits

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Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they are all dead.

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What's the difference between a lesbian and a Pringle ? One is a snack cracker, the other is a crack snacker.

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Why did the boy cry when he got circumcised? Because he couldn't fap.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there was a red light and it was his turn to cross.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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What eats McDonalds for breakfast, lunch and dinner, annoys everyone around them, and could care less about anyone but themselves? The population of the United States.

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why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a date-rapist

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Whats the difference between ice cream and dead babies? I'm not eating ice cream right now.

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Knock knock Who's there? No Who is over there

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A duck walks into a bar.... Animal control is swiftly called and the duck is relocated to a nearby park.

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Why was the alcoholic unable to pass a stool when he sat down on the toilet? Because he did it on the floor.

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A man made a sandwich.

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Why did it take so long for the baby's to paint my wall? I didn't throw them hard enough.

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Why did the New York Times cancel Otis Redding's subscription? Because he died.

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What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

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You are so average that, if you entered an average contest, you'd come in middle place.

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Knock, Knock Who's There? (Silence) Wondering who was there, the man opened the door, to find a baby in a basket in front of him.

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Q: What is the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

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A fat man and his dog walk into a bar...the man buys a beer and walks out

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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