What do you call Batman and Robin after they are run over by a steam roller? Dead

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A man walks into a bar.

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A blonde and a brunette are stuck on a desert island, they later died of starvation.

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What happened to the little kid who went surfing? Answer: he gOt eaten by a shark

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A mosquito flies into a bar and orders a bloody mary, the bartender then takes out a swatter and kills the pest. Noticing the event, the patrons cheer and continued drinking their frothy beverage. Minutes later, the phone rings and the bartender answers the phone. "Hello?" "Hi, I'm looking for a friend of mine, is he there?" "Let me check, by the way, what's his name?" "Jack Hoff" "One sec. HEY FELLAS(yelling over the noisy bar), IS THERE A JACK HOFF HERE? I NEED A JACK HOFF! ANYONE?" Mr. Hoff, sitting at the bar hears this and asks, "who is it?" "He said he's a friend of yours!" "Which one?" " He said his name's Dick Stroker and he needs help on something hardhe'll meet you around back." "Oh ok, thanks."

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rishi is gay (coventry england)

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How do you kill an Asian? Poke him with a large fork until hes dead.

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whats bloody and mingen Scabbaz head

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I was wondering why the ball was getting bigger. Then I got stabbed.

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Roses are red violets are orange......... Wait did I do that wrong?

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-if you're American in the kitchen, British in the living room, what are you in the bathroom? -in the bathroom.

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Whats Yellow and has arms. A lemon i lied about the arms.

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Friends are like pickles. If you eat them, they die.

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what's worse than getting a paper cut? Hiroshima

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he has a great career and a loving family.

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How does your sister ride a bicycle? My sister does not have any legs.

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a guy jumped out of a plane...he died

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knock knock who's there no one

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No reason.

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That is so sweet of you, for a moment I thought I had said something that might have insulted you, but then again, considering the length of the message I see why it took so long.

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What do an elephant and grapes have in common? They both have a trunk...except for the grapes

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a person smokes weed... and gets high

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What's the difference between a black man and a pizza? The black man has a family of four and is working 12 hours a day at a minimum wage job to afford the high rent, the utility bills, and to buy the pizza to feed his family.

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What's the different between a trampoline and a baby? You take off your shoes before jumping on a trampoline.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops