Knock Knock [Opens Door]

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What do you call a room full of lawyers? A group of legally educated professionals.

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What's black, dangerous and sits in a tree ? A crow, with a machine gun !

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Why weren't there any black people at the book sale? Black people don't read.

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping at least one of the puns would win but, unfortunately, the highest he placed was 4th.

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Why was was a black guy carrying a tv out of someone else's house. He was helping them move.

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Why did the mother tell her son to get a job. She was tired of buying Generic brand food.

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Hi

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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What is the difference between a rat and an italian? nothing.

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The cookie monster walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why do you seem so blue?" Everyone laughed. Then the cookie monster replied "my wife died."

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How do you make a nerd cry? Give him a 99% on a test.

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Q: What's up? A: Definitely not a plane, due to an unfortunate hijacking and terror bombing shortly after departure. There were no survivors.

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What happened to the blonde pregnant women? She died giving birth to her blind and mentally challenged son.

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i once thought i could do crytal meth but then i thought naw better not

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What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? A quarter ponder with cheese.

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What did one skeleton say to the other? Nothing... Skeletons don't have vocal cords

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What do a woman and a female dog have in common? They were both annoying so I put them down.

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Why did the cat explode on the street? Cause i put a grenade in a fridge and then threw it at it.

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Roses are red, Bacon is red, Poems are hard, Bacon

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If you driving a jetski and the wheeles fall off how many screws does it take to fix the dog house? BLUE PAINT

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I Won a Math Debate................ say it fast unless your blind then dont say it wait you cant read it so uhhm Alaska

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Black people are ugly. They should not live in this world. They are apes. They should live as apes not humans. Why do they have ugly curly hair, fat lips, and a big flat nose? SO UGLY!! EWW

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Whats The Difference Between A Baby And A Watermelon ? You Can Throw One In The Air And Hit It With A Bat , And The Other Ones A Watermelon

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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