Knock Knock [Opens Door]

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What's black, dangerous and sits in a tree ? A crow, with a machine gun !

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What do you call a room full of lawyers? A group of legally educated professionals.

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how long does it take a black woman to shit? 3 to 5 minutes depending on the food she ingested earlier that day

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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Why did the mother tell her son to get a job. She was tired of buying Generic brand food.

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Why was was a black guy carrying a tv out of someone else's house. He was helping them move.

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Hi

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How did the blond become a lawyer? She didnt. After many years of collage and studying, she broke down and quit, and became a stripper.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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What is the difference between a rat and an italian? nothing.

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Q: What's up? A: Definitely not a plane, due to an unfortunate hijacking and terror bombing shortly after departure. There were no survivors.

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How do you make a nerd cry? Give him a 99% on a test.

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How long did it take the world's most powerful democracy to elect a black President? Less than a day.

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What happened to the blonde pregnant women? She died giving birth to her blind and mentally challenged son.

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The cookie monster walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why do you seem so blue?" Everyone laughed. Then the cookie monster replied "my wife died."

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What did one skeleton say to the other? Nothing... Skeletons don't have vocal cords

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i once thought i could do crytal meth but then i thought naw better not

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What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? A quarter ponder with cheese.

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I Won a Math Debate................ say it fast unless your blind then dont say it wait you cant read it so uhhm Alaska

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Why did the cat explode on the street? Cause i put a grenade in a fridge and then threw it at it.

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If you driving a jetski and the wheeles fall off how many screws does it take to fix the dog house? BLUE PAINT

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What do a woman and a female dog have in common? They were both annoying so I put them down.

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Roses are red, Bacon is red, Poems are hard, Bacon

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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