What's the difference between a duck?

Joanna walks up to a random house, knocks on the door,"Is this where the party's at?!"

There once was a man from Peru, Who fell into an extremely deep sleep and woke up just before he choked to death on his shoe rubber.

What lights up a soccer stadium? A soccer match.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Most likely to get to a source of food or escape a predator.

How do you get a pirate out of your seat? Politely ask him to move for you were there first.

What is black and blue and red all over? Rihanna

What did little Mindy Granger find on her paper route? Human teeth.

nba live 13

It is so hard to write an antijoke.

Q. What did the man say when his car broke down. A. Damn it, my car broke down.

Heartlight

why wouldnt sally stop spinning? she was trapped in a washing machine

Yo mama so fat, she farts dust

what happens when an unstoppable force hits an unmovable object? it goes around.

My nigga so racist he killed a man cause he was white.

Woman Rights

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

Why did someone see a penguin walking in the desert? They were dreaming, because Penguins waddle and live in the Arctic.

After the haitian revolution, Haiti lived happily ever after, Until god smited them with a devastating natural disaster

What was the last thing the clown said to his wife before she died? Rebecca, just stay with me, the ambulance is almost here.

Alcatraz is reopened only for Kevin's ma

a drumset fell off a clif. Badoom ch.

Q: What do you call a Muslim controlling a plane? A: A pilot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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