So there are two skunks in a bath tub. One of the skunks says to the other, "Would you please pass the soap?", and the other skunk says, "What do you think I am, a talking radio?!"

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A Jew and a German walk into a bar.

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What did one homo say to the other? Well, the politically correct term is homosexual, and he didn't say anything because they've never met.

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What color was the duck? It had one foot.

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hi will

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So a man walks into a bar, asks for a beer, then drinks it. He then goes home expecting to have dinner with his wife and 2 kids. His wife smells his breath before that and asks him what happens. The men opens to his true and only love and tells her he's having a bad time at work. So they share a hug and talk about it. The man is then renewed, starts pulling up at his job and gets a promotion to general supervisor. He lives happily and watches his kids grow and become professionals. He then dies of a heart attack at the advanced age of 89 while he was watching his favorite TV show.

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Marrage s like a card game. You start off with 2 hearts and 1 diamond. You end up wishing for a club and a spade!

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Q: What's small and can't read? A: A candybar

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If you like this, it will have one extra like

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A black man, a Jewish man, and an Indian man are all in the taxi when they were all killed in a car crash. Who was driving the car? The taxi driver.

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Knock knock Who's there? Doorbell repairman

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So a baby seal walks into a club...

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Why didn't Kurt Cobain drive to work on Monday? He killed himself.

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When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then watch the world as they wonder how you did it

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What did Anne Frank say to the Nazis who found her? Please be gentle.

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whats red and bad for your teeth... A brick.

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How many pairings of animals did Moses collect before the rain started? 1. 500 2. 50000 3. 500000000 4. Nobody really knows 5. It was Noah... Moral: Lol.

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Whats green and has wheels? A Rednecks front lawn.

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Why did Jimmy cross the road? Because a chicken was about to cross the road, and he wanted to be kind and help the old 72-aged chicken get across the road. Because Jimmy had a grandfather that passed away because he was too old and nobody helped him cross the road. Jimmy is haunted by that memory and doesn't want that to happen to anyone else. Especially a chicken.... Also there were no cars and his best friend chicken was on the other side waiting for him.

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a boy walks over to the living room and shouts " happy birthday, daddy!!" the response is "i'm a cup, therefore i do not have a birthday because i am an inanimate object."

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65% of people are starving 32% are over 190 lbs. Think about it

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Whats Black White and Red all over? oh, wait. what time were we supposed to meet that landlord?

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Your mum. Your mum who? Dinner is ready, come down stairs.

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what did one cupcake say to the other cupcake? nothing because they were both cupcakes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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