Whats Yellow and has arms. A lemon i lied about the arms.

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Friends are like pickles. If you eat them, they die.

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-if you're American in the kitchen, British in the living room, what are you in the bathroom? -in the bathroom.

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What do you call Batman and Robin after they are run over by a steam roller? Dead

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Your momma's so fat that she has a body fat percentage of 37 and is clinically overweight.

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How do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator? Look at your refrigerator.

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A man walks into a bar.

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A blonde and a brunette are stuck on a desert island, they later died of starvation.

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knock knock who's there no one

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How does your sister ride a bicycle? My sister does not have any legs.

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a guy jumped out of a plane...he died

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what's worse than getting a paper cut? Hiroshima

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What happened to the little kid who went surfing? Answer: he gOt eaten by a shark

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A mosquito flies into a bar and orders a bloody mary, the bartender then takes out a swatter and kills the pest. Noticing the event, the patrons cheer and continued drinking their frothy beverage. Minutes later, the phone rings and the bartender answers the phone. "Hello?" "Hi, I'm looking for a friend of mine, is he there?" "Let me check, by the way, what's his name?" "Jack Hoff" "One sec. HEY FELLAS(yelling over the noisy bar), IS THERE A JACK HOFF HERE? I NEED A JACK HOFF! ANYONE?" Mr. Hoff, sitting at the bar hears this and asks, "who is it?" "He said he's a friend of yours!" "Which one?" " He said his name's Dick Stroker and he needs help on something hardhe'll meet you around back." "Oh ok, thanks."

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rishi is gay (coventry england)

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I was wondering why the ball was getting bigger. Then I got stabbed.

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How do you kill an Asian? Poke him with a large fork until hes dead.

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a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

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What's the different between a trampoline and a baby? You take off your shoes before jumping on a trampoline.

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What's the difference between a black man and a pizza? The black man has a family of four and is working 12 hours a day at a minimum wage job to afford the high rent, the utility bills, and to buy the pizza to feed his family.

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why was little jimmy sad? he had a frog stapled to his mouth why did little jimmy drop his ice cream cone? he got hit by a bus why did little jimmy fall of the swingset? he didnt have any arms what did little jimmy want for Christmas? parents what did he get for Christmas? cancer knock knock whos there? not jimmy

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Whats the difference between a Black man and a White man Skin color and possibly many other things because that is reasonable and normal.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? not having an apple to find a worm im

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why did the chicken cross the road? because the chicken had enough of life and wanted to commit suicide due to recent tragic events such as his cheating wife, his druggie son, his prostitute daughter, losing his home, and getting fired

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops