I know what you do with your right hand. You part-take in everyday activities such as eating, typing, grooming and maneuvering.

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Have ever seen Helen Keller's house? No. Neither has she.

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Do you ride the bus to school or do you take your lunch?

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How come the man couldnt read the directions? He was reading it upside down.

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What did the man with Alzheimer's get for Christmas? Happy New Year!

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A priest and a rabbi are walking down the street when they see an orphanage on fire. "Oh my god!" says the rabbi. "We have to save the children!" "Screw the children!" says the priest. "Out of what?" replies the rabbi.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven raped and murdered eight's family.

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Did you hear about the absent minded professor that tried to change the tire on his pickup truck? He forgot to lock the jack and the truck crushed his head like and egg shell.

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Roses are red. Violets blue i do fuck people. MAYBE u too?

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Jerry: Hey, do you smell that? It kinda smells like updog. Moe: What's updog?

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Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says, "I'll have some H20" and the second one says, "I'll have some H20 too." The second scientist dies after drinking hydrogen peroxide.

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If your uncle helped you off An horse, would you help your uncle jack off an horse?

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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yo mama so old she was a waiter at the last supper.

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Q. Why did the woman fall out of the tree? A. Cause she got laid

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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How do you get a nun pregnant? You have sex with her

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If you go to an animal shelter to get a pet god, you may be dyslexic.

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I really might try and kill myself when I get home tonight.

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What's clear and wet? water

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Boy: If you didn't have feet, would you wear socks? Girl: No. Boy: Then why do you wear a bra?

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Why is your dad gay? Because he takes an enjoyment in a mans dick

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What's pink fluff? Pink fluff. What's blue fluff? Pink fluff holding it's breath. What's red fluff? Angry pink fluff. Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a tr-- No. What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple, 'cause the other half's in your mouth. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Angry pink fluff. What's worse than angry pink fluff? The holocaust. That's not funny. Stop laughing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops