What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Bat-mobile? - "Robin, get in the Bat-mobile"

thumb_up thumb_down -35

person: Knock knock. Me: Who's there? person: A Hipster. Me: False.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

What rhymes with Hitler? Walt Disney.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Why did the man burn all the children? He was a psychopath.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

thumb_up thumb_down -37

What happened to the boy after he ate a piece of Halloween candy? He died. It was laced with cyanide.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

A man walks into a bar, and spends all his money because he is an alchoholic.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

A Blonde arives at the airport late, and misses her flight. The airline provides her with a complimentary ticket for a later flight and she departs on that.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

What is 2 + 2? 3 LOL

thumb_up thumb_down -39

A man walks into a bar and says "ow"; he stepped on a nail sticking up through one of the floorboards. He then sues the bartender for a large sum of money because of the injury he sustained, and causes the bartender to lose everything he owns in order to pay off his debt.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Hello Carolina, let me lick your vagina.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Why did Suzie fall off her swing? She was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -51

What's the difference between a tomato and a rhinoceros? Neither of them can ride a bicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

In my opinion I am superior to you all in every single way,an opinion you might disagree with, but can respect. While on the other hand, I have no reason to respect and even less agree with your inferior opinions at all.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

A grasshopper hops into a bar and orders a drink. "Hey! We have a drink named after you!" exclaims the bartender. "You have a Melanoplus Differentialis?" asks the grasshopper. "Yes."

thumb_up thumb_down +68

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down +60

What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

What's the difference between a baby and a mushroom? One is delicious, the other is a mushroom.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Little Davie was a kid with no arms and legs and one day his friends Came to his house and knocked on the door and asked for little Davie And asked if he wanted to come play baseball..Little Davie replied "I'd Love to but I have no arms or legs" his friends say we know that..We were Just needing a second base..

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Why did the girl put on make-up and perfume? Because she was ugly and smelled bad.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What did the thin Italian say to the fat Italian? I don't know, I can't speak Italian.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Whats small, red and white, and would kill you if shot out of a cannon? A decapitated baby

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What d u tell Simba when he's moving to slow? Muvasa

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops