Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I am a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? Because it is the decaying remains of a corpse and therefore lacks brain and muscle tissue depriving it of the ability of though and movement both of which are key skills in the art of dancing.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What is pink and smells like red paint? Pink paint

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q. Whats green jumps up and down and then red? A.A frog in a mixer

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Knock knock (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) Fuck me, that's the most echo-y door I've ever knocked on.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call it when a black man and a japanese woman get married? A wedding.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why was the man thought to be peculiar? Because he had sex with a pistachio.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Your mom is so stupid she makes stupid people look not stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's worse than Fantasy Basketball? Playing Fantasy WNBA.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Whats the difference between an oven and a fridge One is hot and the other is cold

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A priest and a rabbi are walking down the street when they see an orphanage on fire. "Oh my god!" says the rabbi. "We have to save the children!" "Screw the children!" says the priest. "Out of what?" replies the rabbi.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

what did the dirty homeless girl get for Christmas -A DILDO

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's the difference between Batman and a black man? Batman is a fictional superhero and a black man is an ordinary man of African descent.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Hi

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: How much does it cost to have 50cent and Nickleback perform together? A: 45 cents, because its 50 cents, and you get a nickle back

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the man starve to death? Because his wife died

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Mirror mirror on the wall. Why can't I see?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you call a doctor whos black A doctor

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Two drums and a cymbol fall off a cliff... ba bum BUM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA it used to be ba dum ching but im so funny that i changed it to ba dum bum. credit to Alex H

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

why was little jimmy sad? he had a frog stapled to his mouth why did little jimmy drop his ice cream cone? he got hit by a bus why did little jimmy fall of the swingset? he didnt have any arms what did little jimmy want for Christmas? parents what did he get for Christmas? cancer knock knock whos there? not jimmy

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Nothing, we eat pizza and we respect Jews.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops