I am in love with pizza. It was a friday night and i was hanging around with my so called friends 'banana-rama' 'pearman' and 'peaches' (keep in mind these are all fruit). I ordered a pizza from Poker Pizza and it came an hour later i brung it to my kitchen and i opened the box. It was lovely. I eat it, i soon realized that I had eat my one true love and decided to order another pizza.

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what did the man say when he walked into the bar? ouch!

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What's white, black and can't fit through a man hole? A nun with a spear in their head

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What do you call a dick with blonde hair? Joffrey Baratheon.

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Q. What do you call cheese that's not yours? A. Stolen, you're under arrest.

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What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

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Why did the baby cross the road? A very uncaring parent left their infant outside. The unsupervised baby then crawled under the fence and began to head towards the road. When the baby began to cross the road, there were two cars coming from both directions. Luckily, they saw the baby and came to an abrupt stop. Unfortunately, when the baby made it to the other side, an eagle swooped down and snatched the baby, because it is a bird of prey. Fortunately, the child's life was spared by the eagle. The Department of Child Services showed up later only to confiscate the baby from the parents. The eagle wanted to adopt it, but it could not speak nor could it sign the legal documents because it was an eagle.

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What do Jack the Ripper and Winnie the Pooh have in common? They have the same middle name.

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why was the little boy happy? Because he wasn't in the penn state locker room.

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Knock knock Who's there A girl scout A girl scout who? A girl scout trying to sell cookies to support her alcoholic parents who beat her

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Knock knock Who's there? To To be continued.

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Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes and if she does not stick to her medical diet, her foot will be removed, but she started binge eating because of you in the first place, and if you don't straighten our your life, you will inadvertently be the cause of your mothers death.

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Q. Why did the woman cross the road? A. Who cares, what was she doing out of the kitchen

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What goes up and down but never physically moves? My grade.

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If you are my friend like it!

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What do Tutankhamun and Elvis Presley have in common? They're dead

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What did Frodo do when he realized that he needed to destroy the ring? He simply walked into Mordor

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2 + 2 = fish

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Why couldn't the man read? Because he was illiterate

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How many Polacks does it take to change a lightbulb? Two, one to change the lightbulb, one to hold the ladder.

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Why do they give old people Viagra at nursing homes? Because erectile function decreases with increasing age, and it would be unfair to needlessly deny senior citizens the right to consensual intercourse if that is what they want.

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A Blonde arives at the airport late, and misses her flight. The airline provides her with a complimentary ticket for a later flight and she departs on that.

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Why is a chicken coupe, a coupe not a sedan? Because a sedan would have four doors.

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Your mother's so fat that when she goes through rotating doors, the doors rotate around her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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