There was a Black and a Mexican in a car, they were on their way to church.

Q. Why did the 8 year old girl scream and cry when she was raped? A. I no idea either. I drugged her and taped her mouth closed.

What do you call a Muslim pilot? An accident waiting to happen

Q:What's worse than stepping on lego? A:Hiroshima.

A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. "Why of course," comes the reply. The first man then asks: "Where are you from?" "I'm from Ireland," replies the second man. The first man responds: "You don't say, I'm from Ireland too! Let's have another round to Ireland." "Of course," replies the second man. I'm curious, the first man then asks: "Where in Ireland are you from?" "Dublin," comes the reply. "I can't believe it," says the first man. "I'm from Dublin too! Let's have another drink to Dublin." "Of course," replies the second man. Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks: "What school did you go to?" "Saint Mary's," replies the second man, "I graduated in '62." "This is unbelievable!", the first man says. "I went to Saint Mary's and I graduated in '62, too!" About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. "What's been going on?" he asks the bartender. "Nothing much," replies the bartender. "The O'Kinly twins are drunk again."

Q.whats black and white and red all over A. half a zebra

whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? the pizza doesn't scream when it goes in the oven. By darragh Hamilton

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

How much does a Polar Bear weigh? Approximately 500 lbs

Why do black people have dark skin? Lack of melanin in their skin. You learn something new every day.

Haikus are easy. but sometimes they don't make sense. refrigerator.

What time is it Mr.Wolf? About half 5. Alright, thanks mate. How's the kids? Managing. Yeah. Yeah. Crazy world. Anyway, Got to be going. Yeah yeah. Say hi to the wife for me. Will do. Alright, Bye. See you later.

A man named Cecil walks into a bar. He then orders a drink.

The person below me is weird.

Roses are gray Violets are gray ROFL I'm a dog

Why was the boy in hospital? He fell off the bus and was run over by many cars.

Did you hear about the big Polish tragedy? There was a power outage in Poland's busiest shopping mall, People were stuck on the escalators for 4 hours. A woman gave birth in the elevator and died.

What do you call a fish with one eye? A fish

Why did the house get trashed? Cause the babysitter was a rooster

Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because his face was stapled to the wall.

What's wrong with Barney? He's big and purple.

why did matt daly shit his pants? he had downs

A hitman and his target walked in the same bar togather what happend? nothing because a hitman has better things to do and the target would lay low.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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