A donkey walks into a supermarket and asks the cashier "Where are the potatoes?" The cashier replies "aisle 3" The donkey goes to aisle 3 And there are no potatoes

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is blind and death, making her oblivious of her surroundings and would be a danger to fellow commuters. -mac

Why did the elephant fall on the marshmallow? Because he didn't want to fall in the hot chocolate!

your mamas so fat her weight is 3.14 without the decimal

Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers The middle one is for you

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

what do you call a starfish living 500 miles under the sea? A starfish.

Whats the similarity between your mom and me We are both men except for your mom

Whats worse than 3 black guys. 4 black guys.

I win an iPad for pooping on someone's head Answer- We have a muddaf**kin winna

Roses are black Violets are black Im Helen Keller WWWHHAATTTTT!?!?

Why was the little boy crying? Because a stranger shoved explosives up his butthole.

Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? Because he uses only the finest ingedients.

Flop dog

What happened when a man drove up to an escort and said "want to check my bags?" The escort replied "Certainly, sir" due to the fact the escort worked at a hotel.

So a bunch of blondes are in a group and a murder comes by and sais, "if you want to live, answer a question right." so the blondes pick there smartest on. the first question is, what is 9+4... the blonde answers five, the crowd goes "give her another chance giver her another chance, same thing happens, she gets it wrong and the crowd goes "give her another chance, give her another chance." the murderer sais "ok fine this is your final guess, what is 2+2" the blonde goes "uuhhhhhh... 4?" And the whole crowd goes "give her another chance give her another chance

What's the difference between a Jew that is half Jewish and a Jew that is fully Jewish? 1/2

What did the gay man do last night? Had a curry

What is invisible and smells like carrots? The smell of Carrots. Pretty sure you can't see smells.

What is the mexican dream? To jump the border

one day four teenage boys started doing drugs. They jumped off a cliff and died.

What's worse than watching 5 homeless men have an orgy? Waking up and having to clean the sheets

Why did the rabbit cross the road? He was attempting vehicular suicide after being told yet again that he was "silly" and "Trix are for kids."

What's the difference between Bobby and a plane? Bobby can be sexually molested.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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