What do you call someone with the world biggest encyclopedia on their head? Dead.

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An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The barman notices this rather humorous cliche and proceeds to point it out, laughs are shared by all.

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What do women and airplanes have in common? They both have cockpits!

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies " My daughter just died of leukemia."

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A: Hey ask me if Im a fire truck? B: Are you a Fire Truck? A: No why would you ask that?

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dildos are red, vaginas are blue, mother, what have I done to you?

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If a bear was mad he would be beary angry.

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How much Is a free app on my market?

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Luke Hardie is G@Y

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Why didn't the cat eat its supper? It was dead.

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What do you call a blonde who tries to swim on land? - Stupid.

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Why couldn't the young pirate get in to the movie? Because he wasn't old enough.

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What's larger than a grandmother clock? Plenty of things.

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what did the dog say? dogs can't talk therefore he said nothing

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Why did the guy with alzheimer's say to his wife? He can't remember.

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Do your parents know you're gay?

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Why did the black man go to school? So he could graduate with a degree and persue his life in medicine. He later goes on to get his P.H.D. He now supports his healthy family of 5 and living in Idaho, the state of the potato. He has a job as a doctor and is making more than $2M a year. Ha, didn't expect that now did ya.

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You're tall.

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a man got hit by a truck in brooklyn, JK he got shot, he was in brooklyn, Duh, he stumbled out in to traffic afterwards

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Whats Something everyone has except david? Money.

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Ask me if my name is Jennifer. Is your name Jennifer? No.

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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what the **** is wrong with kieran scotts forhead!

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What did one baby say to the other? Nothing, they're both dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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