A man walks into a bar.

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It's weird how two of the SAME jokes can get different ratings.

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Penis

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Why did the child cross the road? Her parents were abusing her and she wanted to get hit by a car.

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A women driver prepares to park in a small space between to cars on the side of a road. She safely and flawlessy parallel parks, and proceeds to enter a nearby coffe shop for an important business meeting.

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What do you get when you cross professor plum with a candle stick in the library? A dead prostitute. Try and be more careful next time.

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hey! have you seen that clown at Walmart that hides from gay people?

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You're at a funeral & your phone goes off and the ringtone is dead and gone

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Your momma is so dumb she has to have weekly tutoring to help understand finding the value of x in an equation.

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Have you heard about the hipster paleontologist? He liked dinosaurs better when they were underground.

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What do you get when you cross scabies with genital warts? Krusty Krabs.

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What did the retarded asian dolphin eat for breakfast? A big bowl of shit

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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There are 100 men enjoying a cruise to celebrate an important contract going through at their place of employment. The boat then suffers a major malfunction and tragically sinks to the bottom of the ocean, miles from any land masses. Not a single man died, how is this possible? They all used the lifeboats supplied on the boat and followed the standard procedure to deal with such a crisis.

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Kid: mom what happens when grandpa farts? Mom: well son... Everyone leaves the room

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Two muffins are being baked in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says, "Man, it's starting to get really hot in here." The other muffin says, "MUFFINS CAN TALK?!"

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Your mom is absolutely pefect. This makes me love HIM.

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I could even argue that having blood on your penis is kinda fun sometimes.

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So a Quadriplegic walks into a bar.....

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What did my wife say when I asked her to pick up some milk on her way home from work? OK

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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What did the Jew say the Black man after their meal? "Don't worry, I'll pay the bill."

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A man walks into a bar. It was a metal bar. He got hurt.

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What's sad about three black men driving over a cliff?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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